Do you have that one girl who “got away?”
We all do.
You had something amazing with her. You feel like there’s no who can stir up the same awesome emotions in you. Nobody who “gets you” like she did.
For whatever reason, it didn’t work out with this girl. Maybe one of you moved away, the connection faded, or something else. The problem is, she’s still on the back of your mind.
Every time you meet a new girl – no matter how cool or pretty or awesome she seems – you still compare her to the “girl who got away”. And usually, the “girl who got away” wins.
Why? Because you have this glorious idealized version of her in your mind. You remember all the good things about her and great times you had together, and forget about the bad. You’re afraid to let her go, because you might not find another girl like her…
And this leads you down a dark road…
It can cause you to sabotage relationships with new, awesome women. Or, to not even pursue them in the first place.
This is something that can eat at you for years…
I never thought I’d be in this predicament. But somehow, I fell into it.
It started nearly two years ago…
I fell hard for a girl. We had an amazing connection and she had all the qualities I value in a girl. Then, I had to leave her to move across the world to Vietnam.
I tried to forget about her, but she’d always creep back into my mind. I was hesitant to jump into new relationships with women, because nobody seemed to compare…
And I would waste hours and hours thinking of what could have been…
Still, I continued to push forward in life and improve in every area – business, knowledge, fitness, travel, finances, mindfulness, etc.
But at times, I felt like I might never find another girl like her…
That is, until last week.
I happened to be in the same city as her, and we met up for coffee. As she walked down the sidewalk towards me, I laughed. It felt like it always had…
We had a great conversation, caught up for about an hour, and then parted ways.
But something had changed within me…it felt like a gigantic weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
She was no longer this idealized figment of my imagination. She was a living, breathing girl, right in front of me.
And that’s when I realized…
Yes, she’s smart, beautiful, funny, and a bunch of other qualities I value in a girl.
Yes, we have always have a great connection…
But in the end, she’s just another girl.
There are other girls out there who are smart, beautiful funny, and have other cool qualities that I value. Other girls I have a great connection with.
I’ll always care for this girl and value the time we spent together. But for the first time in nearly two years, I felt free.
By hanging on to this idea of the “girl who got away”, I had been holding myself back. But now, I can finally move forward.
Not only that, but I feel like it’s strongly affected my overall vibe and energy. I’m getting more eye contact from women than I ever have before. It’s almost like they can tell, “this guy has moved on. He’s free.”
So, let me ask you: Is there a girl from your past who you still hang onto? Who you still subconsciously compare every new girl too?
How would it feel if you could let her go? What’s stopping you from letting her go?
Listen man…there’s no blueprint for this. No step-by-step for moving on from “the one who got away”. It’s an internal shift you have to make.
But what I can suggest is this. First, realize that although the “girl who got away” is awesome, there are millions of other awesome girls out there waiting to meet you – and once you let this girl go, those opportunities can start opening up.
“Empty your cup so that it may be filled; become devoid to gain totality.” – Bruce Lee
Next, if possible, try to meet up with the “girl who got away” in a location where sex is off the table. Because if you try to fuck her, you’re just going to set yourself back. I suggest coffee or some other day-time meetup. But you must go in with no intention of “getting her back.”
And finally, never stop pushing forward in life. A woman should never be your mission. The more you improve and the more well-rounded you become as a man, the the more you’ll realize you don’t need a girl – or anyone – to be happy. And as a bonus, you’ll also dramatically elevate the quality of women you can attract.